Let's pick up where we left off last time, with George Washington, traitor and liar extraordinaire.
The first POTUS had really bad teeth which is not surprising because he was a British officer at one time.
Whenever George lost a tooth - he lost them all - he would take a tooth from one of his horses or slaves and jam it into his gums and cement it in there with pine pitch.
Washington to one of his slaves; Hey, um, kid, are you gonna be needing all of those teeth until you croak? Would you mind giving up one or two of them for the good of the country?
With his mouth filled with teeth, arrived at by hook or by crook, (he was the inspiration for the Jaws character in that crummy James Bond movie, "The Spy who loved me.") he took down his father's favorite Cherry Tree like a beaver and when asked by his Dad, Hey, George, T'hell happened to the Cherry Tree ? our future POTUS immediately went into An-Administration-Official-Testifying-before Congress mode and said, Dunno; probably one of the niggers did it.
Why would they do that?
Who knows, Pops. I can never figure out what'n'hell they are thinking or doing. You know, I wouldn't be surprised if one day they started naming they kids after me or Jefferson.
Jefferson, has that bastid even been born yet?
Hell, yeah. In fact, you've probably heard tell of his Father; crazy old bastid named Billy Joe. One day, from out of nowhere and for no good reason, he just hauled-off and chucked Baby Jefferson off of The Tallahatchie Bridge. *
Dang..Anyways, why do you prophesy that one day the colored folks will start calling their chirren Washington or Jefferson?
Because of the Plague.
'member back in the day when a lot of folks in Europe were diligently out in the fields, praying The Angelus, and scything away, when evil befell them and they were mightily afflicted and suddenly those nice white folks they began to look like The Atlanta Falcons Secondary and two days later they upped and died.
It was called the Black Death.
Something similar, a mass infection, but completely different - people were being born instead of dying - happened in the south.
Welp, oncet the the farmers and the plantation owners heard about The Black Death they started purchasing slaves in Africa to pick they cotton and when the plantation owners started seeing them darkie women in they mini skirts, ripped blouses, with they hair up in corn rows and what not they got jungle fever and took to misceganating with them and when they chirren were born they were a combination of white and black; they sorta looked like Halle Berry in "Cat Woman" who looked smashing but not as sexy as did Julie Newmar as the Cat Woman in TV's Batman.
At that time on Plantations in the south there were two harvests, one in August for Cotton and one of Mulattoes in May.
By dint of an enormous coincidence, all of the Plantation owners at that time were named Massa, and all of the good girl looking slaves insisted they name was Baby."
Thank you pretend interlocutor, but, let's get back to the politician Washington.
The American voters tried to make Washington a King and he said, Thanks but no thanks; As POUS I will have more power than any King has ever had or will ever have.
Consider them bohunks living in rural Pennsylvania who started to make they own hooch, whiskey, without letting me so much as wet my beak, say noting about paying me taxes.
I knew it would be the first tax imposed on the so-called free men in America but if any of them could have pointed to the part of The US Constitution giving them permission to make whiskey without my express permission I would have backed off; and, if I were King, I know the Privy Council would stop me from this tyranny but, because I was POTUS and even though I know these were good ol' boys, never meaning no harm. I had to put me feet down. HARD!!
* Few Americans know that the woman who wrote that song, Bobbie Gentry, was herself thrown off the same bridge when she was a young girl.
The spot where she hit was memorialised by a highly polished gigantic chunk of marble inscribed with the words "Gentry Landed here."
American POTUS, like Washington and Jefferson, were landed gentry.
Irony much?
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