When I win the lottery I am going to buy The Japanese Shinkansen, or Bullet Train, which runs over 100 mph
I shall host a very expensive festival, to which many famous people will be invited, including wrestling great Professor Toro Tanaka.
When the excitement of the event has reached a fever pitch I will ask Chuck Barris to bang the YUGE golden Gong with a padded mallet to gain the attention of all the guests
“ Ladies and Gentleman, Boys and Girls, and honorable Snow Monkeys, join with me in applause as I break this Nebuchadnezzar Bottle of Champagne on the engine of this modern and marvelous example of exquisite engineering which I now Christen The Shania Train.”
I expect a reaction of stunned silence that will set the Snow Monkeys to screeching and pelting the guests with their feces as Professor Toro Tanaka looks at his buddy The Grand Wizard and says “Rut?”
OK, I need a good song about a train to finish this post.
Bobby Darin...
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